Monday, February 25, 2008

Lunes de Miel (you know, like Luna de Miel, only my Monday was pretty sweet)

(Not including my pounding headache and the fact that I almost walked out the door today in my slippers and the nastifiable weather outside...) today was pretty darn good for a Monday. You wanna know why? I'll tell you.

First of all, somebody at work made cake. It was the closest I've had to my grandma's mayonnaise cake in about 7 years. I'm not sure if it was mayonnaise cake or just yummy moist chocolate cake with the really good white frosting, but it was great. I didn't need two lunch desserts (I also brought a cookie from home), especially with my pint of chocolate-chip-cheesecake frozen custard in the freezer, but it made the afternoon a lot more tolerable.

Second of all, best conversation so far at rotations... revolved around how we need to find one of my professors/friends a nice man to drag her away from the ungodly hours she spends in her office. So my preceptor tells me that my job for the next month is to find said man for this professor. (Apparently every time my preceptor asks the other professor how the love life goes, the other professor says "non-existent, Amy" in a very sassy voice--that's supposed to be my line.) So of course, I tell my preceptor that my job over the next month is to find myself a nice man. And I tell her how Denver is this hotspot of great young Catholics ('cause her complaint was that if you go to Church to meet guys, everyone is too old) but that all the great guys are in the seminary. So she says maybe I'll just have to steal one away (and then cringes and says, "is that sacreligious?"), but then recanted and said that we really need good priests. When you have a preceptor who can lament about my lack of a love life with me and at the same time stress the need for good priests, I'd say that's enough to make my Monday. On a side note, she's happily married with two adorable boys, but she told me to take heart that she was almost 27 before she got married, so I have time.

I got a lovely email today from a rockstar in the Canisius Society (for those out of the loop, read: Catholic Student Organization) who has apparently taken it upon herself to make a weekly calendar of all the Catholic events occuring on campus. Granted, a good chunk of space is filled up by the daily Masses and confession that have always been here. But if you were to look 6 years ago before I got here, that's all there would be. And that puppy was FULL! Adoration, rosary, night prayer, morning prayer, extra Mass, more adoration, fish fry, Stations of the Cross, other student meetings, etc. The group has a softball team and a Saint of the week and tons of other amazing stuff. And I just get to sit back and bask in the fruits that are finally growing. (Because this is a list of highs, I'm going to ignore the fact that I haven't been to any of these events yet because I'm selfish and lazy.)

Even though it's a week away, I got to look forward all day to my trip to Indy this weekend. A-woo-hoo. It's gonna be fairly low stress because everyone is either in Florida, or spending Saturday in Bloomington, or spending Sunday and Monday in Brown County, or whatever. But I still get to see some family and then stop in Des Moines for a little Kiel-time on the way home. There might even be some Steak'N'Shake involved this weekend.

And finally, my board review arrived today which means I no longer have to be so motivated to work out a study schedule, because I can just read a chapter a night and answer the practice questions. Best part is, I can probably get through two chapters tonight before the cheesy Lifetime movie is on. In a departure from the depressing women's issues Lifetime movies, this one has Dean Cain and steals a line from The Wedding Planner. It also has Denise Richards who hopefully plays a wedding planner better than she plays a nuclear physicist. We'll see.

Here's to a week as good as my Monday, and a little of that Denver sunshine coming my way to melt this horrible snow.

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Cheesy boy band gets it right

I don't listen to the Jonas Brothers, but their new song was a Yahoo feature today and I really love the words. So here they are:

If the heart is always searching,
Can you ever find a home?
I've been looking for that someone,
I can't make it on my own.
Dreams can't take the place of loving you,
There's gotta be a million reasons why it's true.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

How long will I be waiting,
To become a better man?
Gonna tell you that I love you,
In the best way that I can.
I can't take a day without you here,
You're the light that makes my darkness disappear.

When you look me in the eyes,
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

Every day, I start to realize,
I can reach my tomorrow,
I can hold my head high,
And it's all because you're by my side.

When you look me in the eyes.
And tell me that you love me.
Everything's alright,
When you're right here by my side.
When you look me in the eyes,
I catch a glimpse of heaven.
I find my paradise,
When you look me in the eyes.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Songs about me

As promised, a blog of songs I wish had been written about me.

**"Take Me There" by Rascal Flatts
As in Waitress, I think it is so easy to get addicted to saying things and having them matter to somebody. This song is about having someone who wants to know the deepest parts of you, your past, your family, everything that makes you 'you.' We all know how much I love to talk, especially about my family and fun memories and about myself. So of course, I would love to have someone whose desire is to "know everything about" me.

**"That's What I Love About Sundays" by Craig Morgan
Kind of an odd choice I guess, but every single time I hear the first verse of this song, I get this incredible longing to have a Sunday of Church, brunch, and a backyard football team. So I guess I wish the song had been written about my future life and future family and all our future Sundays together.

**"Out There" by Sister Hazel
A beautiful song about trying to find your better half. Lyrics like "Take me to sunrise from indigo." Enough said.

**"Ladies Love Country Boys" by Trace Adkins
It's no secret that I like cowboys. Maybe someday I'll come home with one. :) Also in this slot could go a song like "Good Directions" or "How 'Bout Them Cowgirls" etc.

**"What I Really Want to Say" by Steven Curtis Chapman
One of my favorite songs of all time, and definitely in the running for my wedding first dance. I want to find somebody who feels this way about me, but I think more than that I wish I had somebody that I could have written this about. Everyone wants somebody who can give them a place to come alive.

**"More Than You'll Ever Know" by Watermark
I would hope that despite my hang-ups on falling in love, that my life can speak to how I may have shown God to another. Or that the fruit of my prayers for others will bear fruit.

**"Comfortable" by John Mayer
I used to dislike this song because of the insinuation that somebody with a foul mouth was more desirable than someone with a clean one. But I realized it wasn't about the language; it was about having somebody that you were comfortable with and used to and that you could be yourself around. Plus, who doesn't want to have shopping cart races and crash into magazine racks?

**"Baby Girl" by Will Hoge
If my parents had any lyrical or musical inclinations, they may have written something like this. Of course, I have no doubt whatsoever of their love for me, and for all of their guidance and protection and prayers, this song could have been written about me. I'm still waiting for when I'm ready for "one never-ending kiss."

**"Come Away With Me" by Norah Jones
Except I would want to walk through the fields on a sunny day.

**"Almost Like Being in Love" by Frank Sinatra
The day where you're walking around and the sun is warmer and the flowers are brighter and your favorite song comes on the radio as soon as you get in the car, the days (per Susan) of wearing a skirt just because and seeing people that you know at every turn and having that glow about you that leads others to say, "Isn't it obvious. Michelle's in love." Only I'm not. Or I could be, but not in this song.

And of course, any classic love song like "At Last" or "To Make You Feel My Love". There are many others, but it's 9:00 and I have to study chemotherapy now. And do laundry. And call Student Health so I can get my TdaP. Woo hoo.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Everything I need to know I learned in kindergarten...everything I'll never need to know, I learned this week.

I really do enjoy learning, and I realize that this is probably a good thing as I have chosen a profession that, perhaps more than any other, will require me to be a lifelong learner. However, I discovered this past week or so that some things I enjoy learning will offer me absolutely no benefit in my career or otherwise. For example, in micro rounds this week and last, I learned that pseudomonas aeruginosa smells like grapes or corn tortillas depending on the person who is smelling (I smelled grapes, and I always thought that was typical, but two people smelled corn tortillas). And eikenella smells like bleach, very strongly. When is that ever going to benefit me?

There are things I have learned this month that will help me: itraconazole needs an acidic environment to be absorbed orally and is thus recommended to be taken with a cola; CMV pneumonia is common in transplant patients while CMV retinitis is very common in AIDS patients; haemophilus species are the only gram positive coccobacilli; tigecycline covers pretty much everything except pseudomonas and, my life sounds incredibly dull when you put it on paper. Aren't all of you glad that you don't have my daily routine?

I also learned that I like Chuck, the TV show, not the name. I mean the name is okay too, I don't think I know anyone named Chuck. I learned that ham stays good for a really long time. I learned that you don't turn around when you are almost home. No matter what. And I learned that sometimes at the end of the day, if all you're able to be certain about is that being Catholic is exactly what God is calling you to, even if you have no idea what else your vocation entails, it's okay to have that be enough.

After reading Susan's amazing blog about the way life changes for you when you are in love (and sometimes changes even when you aren't), I was hoping to be able to write something truly inspired and witty. But when you spend your day talking about bacteria and yeasts and moulds (don't ask why they spell it like that), it's really hard to come up with something that would just knock your socks off. That's alright. That's why nobody is paying me to be a writer. Actually, nobody is paying me anything right now. Maybe one of these times I'll write a blog about all my potential future blog topics to give me ideas when the creative juice is all dried up. Stuff like my top ten favorite movie lines. Or which song I wish was written about me. Or why I think God uses my enjoyment of food to help me build relationships. You just wait. That life-changing blog is out there somewhere, just waiting to be written. Until then, I'll stick to writing about the telltale odors of microbiology.

Friday, February 1, 2008

Always look on the bright side of life (doo doo, doo doo doo doo doo doo)

Well friends, it's been a rough couple of weeks for me. I've struggled with physical ailments (temporary, then permanent, crowns on two teeth; another filling; the never-ending cold; extreme tooth pain; many sleepless nights), mental anguish (despairing over the thought of never finding a fulfilling career, having idiot moments in my first residency interview, having biggest idiot moment of life during the worst rush hour Denver has ever seen--don't want to talk about it at the risk of getting worked up again), spiritual ups and downs, having time slip by and realizing I only have a week left in Colorado, being a bad friend and not returning phone calls, etc. But, in order to not be in a bad mood when I go to sleep tonight, I wanted to take a look back over these two weeks and pick any shining moments of joy or peace or consolation.

Tonight tops the list (if I ignore my tooth pain), with a couple wonderful hours spent at STM for the clergy appreciation Mass and dinner. Of course I would have a good time because it's all my favorite people: Tschumpers, DeBarts, Weisigers, Contrerases, Stempers, Mama Sue, and so on. Food was good, Mass was pretty good (I mean, it's Mass, so come on...but I was a little distracted), company was great. And of course I'm ignoring the fact that I have to leave all this in a week.

My ice cream that I ate last night--extreme moose tracks--to console myself after the traffic fiasco was very consoling.

We had a potluck at work this week, and in typical me fashion, I didn't bring anything and ate plenty. But we had leftovers for the rest of the week, so I don't think anyone felt offended. Pretty good sandwichs and amazing cookies.

Last weekend, I got to relive the innocence and freedom of a high school freshman, or several, at the Machebeuf bball game. I think maybe I should be concerned that I fit in so easily with a bunch of 14 and 15-year-olds. But really, the whole night was about reminding me how much I love to laugh, and how easy it is to fit in with people or feel like you've known someone forever when you spend the whole night doubled over in hysterics. Plus, pie and icecream. Definition of cool.

My highlight of last week, during the week at least, was my Chuck sandwich that I got to share with Kelly. I had never seen Chuck before and we got to watch two episodes on Thursday. So high quality. Very innocent, fairly clean, cute and funny. I just wish there were more new episodes to look forward to.

We had a great conversation at Oasis this week when we were supposed to be discussing Screwtape Letters and actually ended up sharing how we deal with desolation and dry prayer spells and so on. It was great to have a real conversation, both serious and humorous at times, with people that I didn't know very well but still felt very comfortable with. And then we played Apples to Apples, which usually turns out to be a good time. Even when the card that won for "depressing" was "my love life."

I've had amazing breakfasts for the last week week with minimal effort on my part--tomato and red pepper quiche or leftover gravybread or peanut butter pancakes drenched in syrup. Yummm. In fact, many of my brighter moments over the past couple weeks have been food related. Oh well. Even Thomas Smith said God uses our love of food to bring us close to Him. Well, not in so many words.

Speaking of Thomas Smith, 10 points to STM for an awesome (pre)Lenten series. I love learning about our rich history and tradition through the eyes of someone who knows Hebrew and the Bible like the back of his hand.

Well, there you go. I had some pretty good things happen recently after all. And I think to celebrate that discovery, I'm gonna go have some more dessert (cake was at the dinner tonight) and watch some movie trailers online. And then I'm settling down for a good night's sleep (which, by the way was the top answer in a poll of 50,000 women who were asked what they wanted most. Romance was last. I'll take both if someone's offering.)
I reserve the right to make this blog as worthless to read as I feel like, and also to write as infrequently as I deem necessary. Just thought I'd let you know since I finally decided to share my blog.