Sunday, December 13, 2009

I like smiling, smiling's my favorite!

I'm so glad that I finally watched Elf in its entirety last year so that (INTERCEPTION!!!!) I could fully appreciate all of the quotes that made appearance last night during Christmas Win, Lose, or Draw. But nothing beat Hilary's attempt to draw "Make the Yuletide Gay." And secondary props to Sue for knowing at least the first five words to "Bring a torch Janette Isabella."

During confession last night, Father suggested that I take notice of God's blessings in my life and acknowledge those things for which I am grateful. I missed any semblance of a Thanksgiving post, so I'm going to do a brief list of graces here.

*For laughter, and great friends to share it with. "I think you should eat your dog now."

*For a sister who convinced me to go to confession. And kept my mind off my burning legs on our run yesterday.

*For MLIA. I realize I'm a nerd, but it makes me laugh.

*For a functional fireplace and Christmas music. Yay for the holidays.

*For a stable job. Even if I do have to work the next 10 days in a row. And for 40-hour work weeks.

*For funny Mastercard commercials.

*For Sundays. Football. Scrambled eggs. Coffee. Slippers. Sugar Cookies decorated like Our Lady of Guadalupe.

There are many more things and people and events that make my life more blessed. But I'm having trouble focusing while watching the Bronco game. You knew I was watching because of the interception comment, which incidentally was worthless because of a 15-yard penalty that pushed us out of field-goal range. Stupid helmet rules.


Friday, October 16, 2009

I've got soda

Last night at Old C's, we had the Italian nachos (with extra banana peppers). And Rihannon reached for a few chips and one landed in her purse. She said she would save it for later when she got hungry. Do you know how much it KILLED ME? Talk about a perfect set-up for a movie quote.

"Uh, David, where are the nachos?"

But it would have taken too long to explain, and nobody would have gotten it anyway, because what twenty-something professional watches Angels in the Outfield? So I had to bite my tongue and wait for the conversation to move in a different direction. If only Laura had been there. It would have been another five minutes of "How do you take it?" and "Drop dead. I got sunscreen in my eye," and so on.

Eventually my new coworkers will catch on to the fact that my mouth spits out quotes before my brain can filter, and they'll adjust to the randomness. But no sense in overwhelming them while I'm still trying to fit in.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Monday Morning

So, I woke up in a great mood that was enhanced by a great night of sleep, getting to read about the Rocks' and Broncs' victories yesterday, a fresh pot of coffee, and the prospect of sitting down to read for a couple hours before working out. The whole working out thing hit a snag when it started to snow. Yes, that's right, I said SNOW. Huge white flakes pouring down on the driveway, erasing all memory of the 90-degree sun from yesterday. And the best part was, I didn't mind. Granted, it nixed the bike ride I was planning before work. But it did nothing to dampen my spirits like a snow in Omaha. That gross gray wet sludge that sticks for 4 months.

You know what could dampen my spirits? Incompetence. Like idiots losing a fax that I told them was on its way, and then getting around to telling me about it 5 WEEKS LATER. And now I have to inconvenience the folks who did their part correctly to cover up for the incompetence. Regardless, it has to be better than facing another needle, so I'm gonna try to rectify the situation with another flurry of faxes. Gosh, this sure would be more convenient if I worked day shift and was already within 10 feet of a fax machine. Oh well. So much for my good mood. I'm going to ignore the mess for now and get back to my coffee and my book.

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Irrational to the MAX

If I ever needed a reminder of how severe my arachnophobia is (which I don't, in case you were wondering), last night fit the bill. I don't know if I was comforted or dismayed that Laura's fear seems to mirror my own. Right down to the pitch of the scream. One spider would have been bad enough. One huge, brown, blend-into-the-woodwork-so-your-mom-whose-vision-is-shot-can't-see-him-to-kill-him spider. I was trying to hold a flashlight beam on him, but my hand was shaking so the light was bouncing anywhere but where it needed to be. And Laura is halfway across the room with her shorts balled in her fists hyperventilating. We had a nice good laugh about it. Then I walk into my room and there is another one perched on a poster behind my door. Another scream, and some obnoxious orders for my mom to get her butt back downstairs. And then a third one in my bathroom. Like I said, last night was special. Laura and I both had spider dreams waking us with a gasp this morning.

I wish I understood my phobia. It's not acceptable for an intelligent 25-year-old to be paralyzed in such a way, by something that I could easily crush under my foot. Not that I would, because then I would have to get close to it. Plus, the first spider last night might not have fit under my shoe. (My mom would argue that point, but she doesn't get to be part of the conversation because writing is a way to talk without being interrupted.) I hate feeling so overwhelmed and helpless. Fortunately, nights like last night happen rarely. I mean, to that degree. Me screaming at spiders is actually a relatively common occurrence. It's not uplifting to have your parents laughing at you, but if that's the price I pay for somebody else killing it, that's tolerable.

Here's hoping that I marry somebody who can crush the creepy-crawlies without too much dismay. And that my new house has few causes for the irrationality to come bursting through.

Friday, August 14, 2009

Strep Ho-Ho

Whoa, watch out. I know it's been a LONG time since I've posted. And that's really the reason why I'm posting. I tried to have a conversation with my dad last night about one of my patients. Only I had to stop and clarify about every third word because apparently non-medical professionals understand less than I thought. Can you imagine if I tried to talk to my dad about Strep Ho-Ho? That's what my coworkers call Streptococcus Hominis Hominis. And it made me laugh, but I think you had to be there. Every once in a while when I'm on rounds I pause to think what an outsider might do if they were forced to listen in. And I'm amazed at how much of it makes sense to me when even a year ago, I might have felt like the dunce.

The last two days I've gotten to round with the pulmonary team and our wonderful pulmonary pharmacist. We've seen a lot of CF-ers (one of the reasons why it took me twenty minutes to explain something to my dad), and a lot of cute kids. I've alternately been grateful for my health, sympathetic toward parents, angry at our "bandaid society" (which I don't really feel like writing about), overwhelmed at the amount of knowledge I should know for my job, and in awe at how adorable kids are even when they are feeling their worst. I hope many days are just like the last two days, because then I can rest easy at night knowing that I am in the right career at the right institution.

And now I'm going to regress to my pre-doctorate days and finish watching 17 Again with my family.

Saturday, June 20, 2009

The other me

I'm closing in on 100 posts folks. Pretty soon I'll have time to blog more regularly. For now, I just wanted to punch out some thoughts so that my head is clear enough to get another great 10 hours of sleep. I love having a weekend to myself. It's amazing for morale.

Post topic: Tonight I saw The Proposal. It was essentially what the critics said: recycled movie ideas, but decent enough if romantic comedy is your cup of tea. There were things about it that I didn't love. But that's not the point. The point is, a scene in the movie has my "nostalgia for the future" cranking at a fast pace. They are talking as they fall asleep and Margaret starts listing off things about herself that Andrew doesn't know. Things that being an executive assistant wouldn't tell you about a person's life and past. Things that a fiance should know. And I wanted to have that conversation with somebody. It's why I like changing my facebook profile, to be able to say a little extra something about me and what makes me who I am. I was already talking with Coco tonight about things that only people very close to me know, so I'm gonna lay some of it out for the purposes of not having my mind running through this potential future conversation while I'm trying to go to sleep. That was a long explanation for a post topic, but here goes:

I get goosebumps when other people chew ice, ice cream, popsicles, anything. I can't watch it or hear it or think about it. I just got goosebumps right now. I put my pants on left leg first. When I was little I wanted to be an architect, a jockey, a marine biologist, and a cowgirl. Well, I still want to be a cowgirl. The first book I remember reading is The Pup Went Up. When Laura and I had bunk beds, if I couldn't sleep, sometimes I would toss and turn to make the bed squeak so she would wake up and talk to me. I was devastated when my dad ran over my tricycle wheel with his car. Even though I think smoking is disgusting, I used to love candy cigarettes because I still felt cool pretending to smoke. I like playing ping pong with people I don't know because they are always surprised that I can hold my own. I love wearing soccer cleats because it makes me feel like I am a better soccer player than I actually am. My favorite ice cream is Vanilla Swiss Almond. I have never had a manicure or pedicure. I don't have any good scar stories because the scar on my eyebrow from a head-first dive into the coffee table faded a long time ago. Mia Hamm signed my cast when I broke my leg and Julie Foudy thinks that my leg was broken because my brother fell on it. I've been swimming with sharks--no cage. I wish that more people understood my job. I'm a bad driver. I like to walk around when I brush my teeth. I am a closet Hanson fan, which I guess now just makes me a Hanson fan. The first time I dyed my hair, I was too much of a sissy to go bold and in the end, you couldn't even tell the difference. I have no food allergies, but I might as well be allergic to olives. I used to dance around the living room with the four-foot-tall inflatable Santa and pretend I was at my wedding. Sometimes I drink coffee without sweetener just to prove I like it (which I do, I just prefer Splenda). I like the way my handwriting looks when I use a fine-point Sharpie. I once tried to tie-dye a pair of canvas shoes.

Alright. I've tried to stay away from the easy things. My favorite song is Come Monday. My favorite color is purple. I hate my hair and my toes. I can't wink or whistle. And now I'm out of ideas and I'm tired. Which I suppose was sort of the point. Good night.

Monday, June 15, 2009

The Perfect Day

No, I have not just finished the perfect day. I wish. What I did do today was experience enough glimpses of the perfect day to get me thinking about it. Of course, I took the day off, and in any sane universe, the perfect day would not involve work. At least not of the job kind. Nobody loves their job that much. Except maybe a rodeo cowboy or a rock star, but even they like to relax. I'm not going to put times on my perfect day events, because that implies that everything has to go according to plan, which of course would not be the case. Let's also assume that any location constraints are gone so that I could theoretically not have to worry about driving from Red Rocks to Silverthorne to Centennial. I imagine here is how my day would go:

Wake up after a long, restful night's sleep, no alarm. Maybe a dog licking my face or the sun hitting my pillow. Relaxing shower, and put on my favorite spring/summer outfit. Go to Mass and see old friends. Enjoy the sensation of feeling very at home in the Catholic Church. Accompany said friends to a cute little coffee shop with a patio and soak in the morning sun while sipping on a perfect insert favorite-coffee-drink-of-the-moment here. Reminisce about fond memories and hopeful futures.

The later part of the morning is always the toughest for me to fill when I imagine my perfect day. I would like to think I would be outside. I suppose whatever activity of the day occurs to me would be fine. Options may include a trip to the Botanical Gardens, an outdoor art show, a short but beautiful hike (remember, location doesn't matter), a zoo outing, planting flowers, a leisurely bike ride around the park, etc. If I'm outside and with friends, it's good enough for me.

Lunch of course would be a bug-free picnic, if those exist. Mostly because again, I'm trying to be outside, and also I love picnic food. Simple sandwiches, fresh fruit, maybe a cookie. Okay, definitely a cookie. We could throw a football or a frisbee or a softball. Lovely.

After all that outdoor time, I think I'm ready for either a nap or a movie or a good book. Part of me thinks I shouldn't waste my perfect day inside on a couch. But the other part of me says that I love sitting inside on the couch. Especially if I have no other obligations. I love watching movies and laughing along with my favorite lines or waiting in suspense for the next scene of a movie I haven't seen. I love the escape of books. You all know that. And I love sleeping. So, none of the above are really a waste.

Dinner would be grilling out on the back deck. Burgers or brats or chicken, and of course, corn on the cob. Lots of friends and family. A couple games of corn toss and ladder golf. Lots of laughing. And watching the sun set over the mountains. Who knows what the night time activity would bring. Maybe some cards. Maybe just more lounging in the back yard. Maybe a game of ultimate frisbee on the golf course. Or a walk around the neighborhood. Or another movie or book.

Okay, in looking back over this, I didn't experience any of this today. Except when I was at the park walking around, I saw a family playing corn toss in their backyard and laughing and drinking beer. It looked like the perfect way to end a summer day. Except it was only about 3:30 in the afternoon. Don't you people have jobs? (Says the girl who took the day off.)

That's all I've got. I think I'm gonna go start cooking dinner. I have chicken and tomatoes and a pepper and no clue what to do with them. We'll figure something out.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

King George

After an entertaining (though not chart-topping) season premiere of Wipeout, complete with a disappointing finish in which Francisco "Suave" Garcia was outmatched by "Cheap Date" (whose name I can't remember), I was in good spirits as I sat down to work on my manuscript and surrepticiously follow the Nuggets game online. I made it through about a paragraph when I realized that I would need some background noise. Knowing my computer's tendency to freeze if it works too hard, I flipped the TV back on. Imagine my delight to find the perfect background noise, the second half of a country music extravaganza George Strait tribute. While the first hour must have had some of my faves performing, most notably Sugarland (darn!), I still got to see/hear wonderful performances from Martina, LeAnn, LeAnn, and Dierks. On a side note, I decided I do like Dierks Bentley. I was waffling because something about some of his photos look a little off (don't get me wrong, I love his music), but after tonight, I'm a fan.

I have this to say about George Strait. He really is King George. I didn't know I was a George Strait fan until tonight. I mean, his two latest hits (I Saw God Today and Troubadour) have polarized me. The former makes me alternately smile and cry and the latter makes me change the station. And so I always heard about George's 50 (yes, 50) #1 hits which actually probably number at 52 or 53 now, and thought that they must have come before my time or been part of a long-gone era of country music. People talk about him being a first-rate story teller, an icon, a legend. And I couldn't jump on the bandwagon. However, this was before I realized that he sang:

Love Without End, Amen
Check Yes or No
Easy Come, Easy Go
Ocean Front Property (love it!)
She'll Leave You With a Smile
Write This Down
Carrying Your Love With Me
You Look So Good In Love
Blue Clear Sky (also love it!)

They are country classics that I always sang along to but never connected with a single artist. Some are fun, some are ballads, some are a little twangy, but I like them all. And I just remembered as I'm writing this that George also sings Give It Away which I think is a haunting melody on the same level as Will Hoge's Dirty Little War as a chronicle of the heartbreak of divorce.

And of course, encompassing all of my feelings about the show tonight is an overwhelming reminder of why I love country music. It's the stories, the cowboy hats, the boot tapping, the being in love, falling in love, dreaming of love, that isn't quite the same in other genres. Yes ma'am, ladies love country boys.

And on a far more random sidenote, I am appalled that the last two days, I've only averaged about 5,000 steps with my new pedometer. Curse the sedentary lifestyle of the outpatient clinic!

Monday, May 18, 2009

Rocky Mountain High Time I Went Home (Before and After is my favorite Wheel of Fortune category)

I wish I had something witty to write. Wet wit, damp if you will, not dry wit. But I don't. Because my mind is pretty much on one thing. Can't wait to go home, can't wait to go home. Seriously, maybe I'm a little bit extra sentimental and emotional after watching Extreme Makeover Home Edition last night (for the first time in probably two years), or maybe it's just that I haven't been home in over four months which has to be a record for me. But I'm dying for that Colorado sunshine, the mountains, the lack of bugs, the Nutmeg, the mom hugs, the dad spoiling me, the Kelly begging me to do something, anything, 'cause she's bored. And Laura of course, who I haven't seen since Christmas. The red recliner. The deck sunsets. The basketball bouncing off the roof because I haven't played in way too long. Seeing old friends at Mass. Waking up in the morning and knowing that the only thing waiting for me is relaxation and a newspaper. Sharing Firefly with my family. Eating good food that I didn't have to cook. No noisy upstairs neighbors with cement shoes. Or at least knowing my noisy upstairs neighbors and feeling completely confident that their sleep schedules mirror my own. Except for that pesky Mary who is a little bit of a wildcard. Just realized I forgot to mention her above. I'm not used to being home at the same time I guess.

Now if only the next three days would fly.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

I aim to misbehave

Okay, so anyone who has talked to me in the last two weeks knows that I'm completely obsessed with the TV series Firefly, a gem of Joss Whedon's fantastical imagination that I've discovered a few years too late. I've been trying to determine what it is about the show that has me so completely enamored. It's very comparable to a year or so ago when I experienced my first Chuck "sandwich," the final two episodes of Season 1 courtesy of Kelly. Or five years ago when I watched the Season 2 finale of Alias. Or my immediate head-over-heels fascination with Women's Murder Club. What is it about these fictional worlds that causes me to ignore sleep, give less than my best at work, opt against exercise or edifying behaviors, and become so immersed in TV?

Part of it is the escape. That's a no-brainer. I love having a world to escape to that is so different from my own-- the world of spies and intrique and suspense and heroism, and most recently, space cowboys. It's just enough of a fantasy to take my mind off the stress of real life.

Part of it is the novelty. With Firefly, it's there in abundance. New slang: shiny!, gorram, corpsified, etc. Cussing in Chinese (which is hysterical). New technology and cultural norms. New characters to champion or crush on or laugh at.

Part of it is Joss Whedon brilliance. In a small way, it reminds me of the first couple seasons of Buffy. The humor is so quick, written so that it requires perfect delivery, but when the actors get it right, they hit it out of the park. "Oh, it's grotesque! Oh, look, something in a jar." "Why, is there someone you are good at talking to?" "'They were cynical, not responding, and we couldn't bring them back'...'No, they were cyanotic, unresponsive, and we were unable to resuscitate them.'" I love how he's able to make it sound like they have developed a whole new language, 500 years in the future, and yet it feels so fresh and current.

Part of it is the character development. And how much they can get me to care about these browncoat rebels after only 14 episodes. Well, really I was hooked after the first two, but who's counting. Part of it is the action. I am my father's daughter after all. Because of the creativity of blending Western and Sci-Fi, we get sword fights, lasers, revolvers, machine guns. It's not that I like violence. More that I like vicariously-experienced adrenaline rushes. I could probably do without the Reavers, but every hero needs a creepy villain, right?

I can't explain it beyond that. But y'all should go watch it. And then we can talk about our favorite moments, quotes, characters, heists, Jayne's awesome hat, Simon's "cryo" way with the ladies, and on and on. You call, we'll chat.

Monday, March 30, 2009

Why it's sometimes okay to talk to strangers on the plane:

On my way to Orlando in December, I sat next to a guy who was going to Columbia. When he told me this, I assumed South Carolina. He meant the country. Anyway, we got to talking about hiking/backpacking and other outdoorsy stuff. And he told me about this deal they have a Backwoods (a sort of small-time outdoor outfitters store), like a birthday club. Buy something at the store to get on their mailing list, and for your birthday you get a free gift. This isn't like a free two-dollar bandanna. No siree. Behold my first birthday gift of the year:

Very cool. (And a $49 value, in case you were wondering.)

Monday, March 23, 2009

Why I love soccer

Yes, I am at work, and yes, the last thing I need to be doing when I've been as stressed out as I have been is surf the net. But I thought I had a meeting that had actually been cancelled, so it gave me a little unexpected time. I just wanted to share what I found. Really awesome photos.

Here are a couple favorites. Unfortunately they still have a watermark on them. But still pretty sweet.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Double the pecans

Here is a quote from a book I'm reading, somewhat unethically in bits and pieces of stolen time at Borders:

"The world would be better off if everyone ate fried foot at least one night a week, and drank coffee you could cut with a knife, and lingered with their neighbors. We’d understand each other a little better, and maybe we’d understand ourselves. Perhaps we’d ponder, over the plastic basket with the grease-stained tissue paper, the need to run so far, so fast—to have, to do, to achieve, to gain, to win—to be all that and make sure everybody knows it. A pecan pie does not toil, nor does it spin, but it sure tastes good, and it makes a fine conversation piece. In the right setting, you can talk for twenty minutes about the merits of a good pecan pie."

It makes me want to be from a small town. The book does, not that quote specifically. That quote specifically makes me want pecan pie. My dad's best-pecan-pie-in-the-whole-world pecan pie. But the rest of the book is a cross between Dancer, Texas, Stars Hollow, and the sappy parts of a Dee Henderson novel. You can understand why it's taken precedence over laundry, and cleaning my bathroom, and getting caught up on work. Not that I haven't been working a lot. It feels like that's all I did last week. And the week before, and the one before that too. I can't quite fathom what it would feel like to only have to work 40 or 50 hours in a week. It's completely beyond the powers of my imagination. I'm trying hard not to complain, because I know I signed up for this and the end is in sight and all that. (Thinking positively was never really a strong suit).

But then I wonder what I would do with all that extra time. Like Laura, I don't really have a hobby that I can call mine, that I can claim as my one excelling talent. Most of my free time right now is spent reading or watching TV. That's not any kind of hobby. I am having a sort of deja vu writing about this, almost enough to make me scroll back through my old blogs to figure out if I've written about hobbies before. Almost. If I have, then the three people who read my blog will be treated to an encore.

In a perfect world, I would have time (and money) to horseback ride, hike, play soccer, play frisbee in the park with my dog, volunteer at kids' sports camps, learn to cook/bake, paint, learn guitar, etc. Right now it taxes my energy to keep the dishes from piling up and having clean clothes to wear to work everyday. But someday...

Someday I'm gonna have my pie and eat it too.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

You wouldn't ask Jesus what kind of cheese to buy

This week, as inspired by my weekly discernment group, my goal was to talk to Jesus. I was going to try to tell Him things as they came up, be in dialogue with him throughout the day, be aware of the thoughts, feelings, and desires of my heart and share them, and not be afraid to ask for help.

Well, Jessi asked Him to fix her lawn mower. I need Him to fix my stupid apartment. Last time the sound of running water coming from my ceiling woke me up after a fair amount of sleep and on the morning of a day off. This time, after only an hour and a half of sleep, and I have to go to work tomorrow. Jesus was a carpenter, so he should be able to figure something out, right? Okay, I'm gonna go in the dining room and wait for the emergency maintenance guy. I hope they don't charge me for utilizing the on-call technician twice in two months.

Pray for my sanity.

Friday, February 13, 2009

In case 25 weren't enough

Here's what I have just discovered: the mix of a glass of white wine, a super long week at work, freshly fallen snow sparkling outside my window, and blaring Taylor Swift is a very quick way to make me want to sing and blog and dance and forget my stress. I'll start with the singing and blogging since I don't think I can dance and type at the same time and to be honest, trying to make my fingers type one thing while my mouth sings another is enough of a challenge with the wine.

I have two things that I want to blog, and one I don't think I'm brave enough to right now. So I'll start with the other which is sort of an extension of the 25 Random Things About Me notes that have been plaguing facebook. I wrote mine and thought that I had been satisfied with my answers until I started reading other people's and realized that there were whole categories of qualities about myself that had been left out. So here I will try to rectify that situation. And bear in mind that my mind is a little scrambled. Mostly from my week at work, and a little bit from the alcohol. It's not like half a glass should affect me that much, but I am already exhausted and loopy so who knows.

1. I love Friday the 13th and am what one might call a triskaidekaphilic. But don't ask me to walk under a ladder, or climb a ladder, or stand on a ladder. They scare me.

2. There are certain songs that I want to share with the whole world and I feel their lives are not complete unless they care about these songs as much as I do. Perfect example: Many Sparrows by Dan Craig is now playing on my computer. Other songs might include Drifting by Sundry, Martyrs and Thieves by Jennifer Knapp, Come Monday by Jimmy Buffett, etc.

3. Sometimes I get these really strong desires to experience scenes from my favorite books. A weekend on the coast from Sundays at Tiffanys, riding bikes and sleeping in late at a Bed and Breakfast. A baseball game on a warm spring day or watching old home videos from Danger in the Shadows. The magic of an adventure and the sense of coming home again from Orthodoxy. Thanksgiving dinner from The Things We Do For Love. It's like I can picture myself there and hope that God has something that wonderful in store for my future.

4. I get really frustrated when I walk behind people who walk slow. I'm naturally a fast walker. It stresses me out as much as working with incompetent people and being late.

5. I love it when people call me 'Mitchell' because it makes me feel loved. Something about having a nickname. I don't know.

6. I wish that other people would try as hard at Oreo racing as I do. It would be nice to have some competition every once in a while instead of slaughtering everybody all the time.

7. Sometimes it scares me how low my self-esteem is. My whole life, I have been able to accomplish everything I've ever wanted to, and I still can't seem to find the confidence to get me through daily life.

8. Making people laugh is one of my most favorite things. My future husband better think I'm funny. Or at least have lots of friends who do.

9. My favorite type of tree is a blue spruce. Mostly because of the crooked one in my front yard growing up, but also because I should've gotten the blue spruce--they're lighter.

10. Not that this should come as a surprise, but everything about Colorado makes me feel at home. The mountains, walking around barefoot, driving by STM, watching the sunset off the back deck, Invesco Field, the french fry building, the cemetary outside Julesburg, the flag, the license plates, the massive amounts of people that always want to spend as much time as possible outside, the bike trail along C-470, REI, Area 5 at the JPII Center, etc. I can't wait to come home.

Ten is enough because it's time to watch a movie. I bought about 7 movies in the last two weeks, and it's time to be a little self-indulgent.

Friday, January 30, 2009


My day today:
Sleep in. Hot granola and juice. Browse Barnes and Noble, then read for an hour while savoring a grande half-caf Americano with milk. Watch Mad About You. Pasta and cookies for lunch. Meeting at work. Boo that. More coffee, this time a decaf nonfat mocha, with Mary at Caffeine Dreams. Got my CDs back--yay DeYarmond Edison. Bought Dr. No and X-Men for a total of $14. Went to dinner with Marijo. New restaurant called Blue Planet. Portabello and Swiss veggie burger, sweet potato fries with chipotle lime cilantro organic ketchup. Yes, it was that kind of restaurant, but very tasty. Home now to watch one of my new movies. What a lovely Friday.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Lenten Resolutions

Well, I haven't found enough time or motivation to sit down and hash out my New Year's Resolutions for this year. I mean, I have goals that I have set to accomplish. Climb at least 2 14ers. Go to a WPS game. Survive my residency. Buy a house. But nothing really on the longitudinal scale of a New Year's Resolution.

Speaking of resolutions, I have, however, discovered what my Lenten journey will NOT involve this year. I will NOT be giving up caffeine. I used to laugh that my mom had her Diet Pepsi and popcorn every afternoon at work for as long as I can remember (until she had to radically change her diet). And then I had a 24-pack of Diet Coke in my apartment courtesy of my loving parents who do their darndest to spoil me from 500 miles away. And after a month of Diet Coke every afternoon at about 1:00, I ran out at the end of last week. I couldn't figure out why I had been so tired this whole week when the clock hit about 2:00pm. Today, I had an epiphany. My body became severely dependent upon that caffeine fix after lunch. When you average 10-hour days, you need a little boost midway through. So I will be making a grocery run shortly. Probably not tonight because Knight Rider is on, and I love my guilty pleasure TV. But tomorrow for sure. Or Friday. Which I'm taking as a PTO-burn day. Basically I saved up so much PTO that I get to burn days as "mental health" days to break up my 12-in-a-row. Only I have to go in for an hour meeting that I scheduled without thinking. Oops. Only myself to blame.

I got interrupted by a phone call from a wonderful friend and as I sit back down, I am no longer in the blogging mood. Until next time.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

I hate my life

I don't really hate my life, but when the sound of running water wakes you up and you realize it's coming from your apartment and then you realize it's the sound of water pouring through the vent in your bathroom ceiling onto your toilet and rug (after you just cleaned everything yesterday) and then you realize it's also coming through your closet and splashing on all your shoes and then it splashes on you and you notice it smells like vomit and then you go upstairs to figure out what's going on and the tenants barely speak English, and all of this is at 6:30 on a Sunday morning on what feels like my first weekend off in months, then yes, I hate my life. And I just want to scream and hit something, but I won't. But I want to. Real bad. Maintenance won't be here for another twenty minutes or so, and I have to pass the time.

Here's what I'd get up for at 6:00 in the morning on a weekend when I'm already sleep-deprived:
- A Women's National Team soccer game. Probably not just any game, but definitely a World Cup or Olympic game. And that's to watch it on TV or my computer. I'd get up much earlier if it meant I got to watch it in person.
- A family trip to Indy. Not that I love them, but usually I don't get much say in the start time. I'm used to it though.
- World Youth Day. To date, it was I think the earliest I'd ever gotten up (for Denver, not Toronto, although that was an early wake-up call as well), but so totally worth it.
- Right now I'm tired enough that I can't think of much else that would be worth it.

Things I would not get up at 6:00 in the morning (or earlier) for:
- Idiot neighbors blaring the music on Halloween.
- Idiot neighbors breaking the glass door on New Year's Eve.
- Idiot neighbors blaring the radio and screaming on a random day in the middle of the week (I would say blaring music, but it was really mostly talk radio)

Okay, I don't feel any better. And it's only been about five minutes. I think I'll make some coffee and go watch Chuck. I really want to scream!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

Tuesday, January 20, 2009

Emotional Heimlich

So, Pushing Daisies has this great line about a hug being an emotional heimlich where somebody puts their arms around you and squeezes you and all your fear and anxiety come shooting out of your mouth in a big wet wad and you can breathe again. You know what else is like that emotional heimlich? Finding out you are going back to Colorado.

After almost 7 years (really it's barely six and a half, especially if you count all the time spent away), one phone call forced all of the fear and anxiety out of my mouth. It was the biggest wettest wad, and now I can breathe again. It's funny how life comes full circle. I worry and panic and study my butt off (and play a lot of computer games and watch a lot of Alias bloopers) for so many years, and then one day all of a sudden, I'm 30-year-old Jenna Rink realizing I got everything I always wanted. Hopefully that's where the parallel ends and I don't end up wishing for it all to do over again after I realize that I wanted the wrong things. But I don't think I've wanted the wrong things. Not when everybody and their brother has been praying for me, and I've been praying that God's will be done and that I may come to desire whatever that will is. This is how it's supposed to be.

I feel a little bit like I've been waiting for my life to start, which saddens me a little to know that I probably haven't been living life to the fullest because I've been hanging my hopes on the dream of someday being back in Colorado. But mostly, I'm excited. And relieved. Okay, like 90% relieved and 10% excited. But that will change as it gets closer.

One of the best parts is that I don't have to start at Children's right away. I get about a month between the end of my residency and new employee orientation to move my stuff, find a house, and do all the stuff that's been on hold for 7 years. I think I might take a wild and crazy vacation. Go stay at a little bed and breakfast on the New England coast and ride bikes and look for seashells. Or spend a week as a cowgirl in Wyoming, herding cattle on a dude ranch and falling asleep sore and exhausted every night underneath the stars. Or maybe go to Vancouver and see the beauty of British Columbia. Definitely I will be hitting up some Rockies and Rapids games. And spending time with the fam. (Especially since I won't be seeing much of them once I start work as I'll be on the evening shift) I know the time will fly and I'll be hard at work again before I know it, but it can't go any faster than this year has. Look at me still living in the future when I have a perfectly good present.

I'm going to remedy that with a little tuna noodle casserole and some Mad About You. Yes my friends, just me and my comfort food and my couch, enjoying a night off. Thanks for all the prayers. You gave me my emotional heimlich, even if you didn't know that's what you were doing.
I reserve the right to make this blog as worthless to read as I feel like, and also to write as infrequently as I deem necessary. Just thought I'd let you know since I finally decided to share my blog.